You know how women have this reputation that all they ever want to do is shop? Well that’s about as far from the truth as you can get when talking about my sister and me (Unless it’s fabric shopping. My sister is always up for fabric shopping). This has not changed with wedding planning. It’s actually become more frustrating because none of us are there in person when the other one is shopping.
This is how conversations tend to go:
Mom: “I found these pumpkins that might make great centerpieces!”
Mom: “Although, the more I look at them the less sure I am about them.”
Me: (With a lot of sarcasm) “I understand completely.”
Mom: “You’ll just have to look at them yourself when you come home.”
Me: “Yes. I’ll do that.”
Yeah, there are challenges about planning a wedding from multiple states. Pinterest only takes us so far. But we’re kind of managing. Mostly. Our key phrase has been “We’ll figure it out when we’re all together later.” That one week my sister and I will be home in November is apparently going to be very busy. But maybe once we’re all in the same room the shopping will be more fun.
Another struggle of this distance thing: without the pressure of seeing my sister every day or every week and therefore needing to collaborate more often, it’s way to easy to push things off. Start looking around at bouquets and bridesmaid dresses? Sure, I’ll do that this weekend…or next…(it has now been over two months I am very sorry sister). Part of my justification for procrastination is there is still so much time; we don’t need to have these things set in stone yet. But they’re also simple things that we could check off the list and actually feel accomplished about in all this planning. (It will get done I swear. I will do it next week).
Thankfully my sister doesn’t procrastinate as much as me, and I suppose being the bride she’s also more motivated. She’s been shopping around on her own a bit for some stuff, and this has presented a whole new set of challenges. For one, shopping as a plus size bride is already a horror on its own, but my sister also needs a good quality strapless bra. Those are incredibly hard to find. In her words, “There are no strapless bras I can put on alone without looking like a contortionist who should be fired.”
Now I want you to follow this train of thought with me: If she can’t find a bra to put on by herself, that means she needs one that someone can help her with. Logically, that falls on the Maid of Honor’s shoulders. Keeping up? Have you realized that’s me? Ding ding ding, I’m the lucky winner!
I knew I’d be helping her into her dress on the big day, but having to help with her bra too blindsided me a little. I’m not saying I don’t want to be as helpful as I can, and I’m certainly not complaining about having to do this. Truthfully, I really don’t mind all that much. It’s just helping my big sister into a bra wasn’t exactly on my bucket list. But hey, that’s what family and Maid of Honors are for, right?
It’s mostly frustrating that I’m not there in person right now to help. All we can do is text pictures to each other or try to explain what we mean over the phone, which isn’t the same at all. And a lot of stuff we want to try and get done keeps getting pushed off until we’re all together. Which makes sense, it’s easier to do it when we’re together. That’s why it’s so hard to be trying to do anything on our own. It’s just a lot harder to support my sister and my mom when I’m hours away. Texting that everything will work out and that it’ll be a great wedding just isn’t the same as hugging them and telling them that.
But for all its challenges, I’m excited to see the final product come together next year. And knowing how much work went into this will make the big day that much better, I think. (You know, assuming we aren’t all dying of stress making sure everything stays perfect).